resisting emotional blackmail | when ’compassion’ corrupts [cc]
An exploration of some mechanics behind emotional blackmail — and in invitation to all parties to step out of it.
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opening quote:
We’re each entitled to stay inside our comfort zones.
We’re not entitled to expect the rest of the world to join us.
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0:00 uncomfortable effects of comfort
3:21 emotion — a double-edged sword
7:54 comfort zones
10:12 oiling the squeaky wheel
13:48 compassion vs enabling
17:32 coping with other people’s coping mechanisms
23:28 rationalisation
29:00 rational mindful solutions
29:57 summary
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subtitles
Bulgarian: Djeitko
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references
Abbott, K.R. and Sherratt, T.N. (2011) The evolution of superstition through optimal use of incomplete information. Animal behaviour 82
Damasio, A. (1994) Descartes’ error: emotion, reason, and the human brain. Putnam, New York
Kay, A.C., Gaucher, D., Napier, J.L., Callan, M.J. and Kaurin, K. (2008) God and the government: testing a compensatory control mechanism for the support of external systems. Journal of personality and social psychology 95 (1)
Kool, W., McGuire, J.T., Rosen, Z.B. and Botvinick, M.M. (2010) Decision making and the avoidance of cognitive demand. Journal of experimental psychology: general 139 (4),
Lindeman, M. and Aarnio, K. (2007) Superstitious, magical, and paranormal beliefs: an integrative model. Journal of research in personality 41
Malinowski, B. (1948) Magic, science, and religion and other essays. Beacon Press, Boston
Zajonc, R.B. (1980) Feeling and thinking: preferences need no inferences. American psychologist 35
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music © TheraminTrees
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