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Feeling overwhelmed literally makes parts of your brain shut down. You might experience cognitive fatigue, sensory overload, burnout, physical exhaustion, a flood of thoughts, confusion, or the stress response, you may feel anxious, sweaty, teary, or panicky alternating in quick succession with wanting to give up, shut down, curl up into a ball, procrastinate and avoid everything.
So here’s what to do instead.
Slow it down. Take a deep breath, and grab a large piece of paper and a pen. Now do a brain dump, take everything in your head and write it down on paper, it doesn’t need to make sense, it doesn’t need good handwriting or grammar, just put it on paper, make a list or a diagram if you want, just take all the things in your head and put them onto the paper.
Usually people feel better after that, but now we’re going to do one better…
Cross off everything that’s not in your control - news stories, your bosses’ attitude, the weather, your mother in law’s opinions, your child’s mood…cross off anything that’s not in your realm of influence. Now if, for example, there’s something you need to do about your child’s behavior- like enforce a boundary or something- cross off- Tommy’s tantrums, you can’t control his feelings, instead write down “I need to enforce a boundary, and it’s so hard”.
After you’ve crossed off everything that you can’t control, and replaced a few of them with things in your control, it’s a terrible idea to try to do them all at once, so just take a deep breath, slow yourself down, and circle one action you’re going to take.
Then set the paper aside and get back to life, do that one thing, or do what you need to be doing in the present moment.
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Therapy in a Nutshell and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.
In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life’s direction.
And deeper than all of that, the Gospel of Jesus Christ orients my personal worldview and sense of security, peace, hope, and love
If you are in crisis, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at or 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or your local emergency services.
Copyright Therapy in a Nutshell, LLC
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